Lost and found…

It’s been a while since I posted anything.

Like the song says…”I was lost but now am found.”

I’ve done more writing than shows up here. I’ve written website content, an email marketing piece, built a bunch of websites, half written over a dozen poems, drilled away at a bunch of short stories and punched keys on the book I am writing.

The biggest thing I have been struggling with is the loss of motivation because I haven’t been out networking and building relationships.

A short while ago I discovered that as I became less and less busy I became less and less productive.

I realized I was lost…

but now I am found.

What does that mean?

It means I am writing again. I have written more in the last sixty days than I have in the four months before that.

In March after neck surgery I lost the use of my right arm. I have some use back but am still limited.

I have found different ways to do things that I was able to do without thinking.

I have learned to accept help when it was offered.

I have been humbled and then I turned that into self-humiliation felt worth less (yes two words because I didn’t feel worthless I felt that I was not as valuable or an asset).

I developed some very bad time wasting habits because I was so unlimited by time and had such a loss of self worth. Those bad habits took control and I would spend a great deal of time being non-productive.

But my creativity has never stopped. My mind still functions and when I use it it functions better. It takes a lot of stimulus and effort to break bad habits. I had to create the habit of creativity. I had to work a few minutes at a time to push away the time wasting habits and transform creative thoughts to production.

I was lost but now am found.

In other words I am back! I have a new attitude and a wonderful appreciation of writing.

I am going to keep develop the writing habit I had and make it a strong again.

Over the last few years I spent a great deal of time networking, building relationships, meeting people, trying to grow a business but during the last few months of isolation I realized (actually it should be admitted not realized) a few things. Here are some of them…

  1. Not many people like me. They don’t dislike me but I am not on their “Let’s go for a coffee,lunch, drink etc. list” I am a fount of useless knowledge that most people don’t care about.
  2. I am not a warm and cuddly personality. I am a bit reserved (some people say aloof) and not a good let alone a great conversationalist.
  3. I am an introvert. I enjoy being alone. I find it hard to be out and be social because I am terrible at keeping up with conversations and knowing the various things happening in the world that people talk about.
  4. I would rather spend three hours writing a paragraph until it conveyed the right message for a client than risk saying the wrong thing (thankfully the clients who hire me want the right message). I am better at project billing than hourly billing because if I went hourly my clients would think I was ripping them off by billing like a lawyer.
  5. Even though I like the knowledge of building a website I would rather just supply the content. (Sadly people value the look of a website more than the content. People see looks but serious buyers and search engines search content.)
  6. I am a “techie”. I love knowing about technical things and am fascinated by equipment, software, technology, anything electrical, energy saving, energy generation, and recycling just to name a few things. I bore people when I start to talk about these things.
  7. I enjoy writing about things and for clients where I have to learn about them and there products or services.

I was lost but now am found…

I am writing again. Stay tuned.



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Posted November 21, 2018 by Dan Beresford in category "habits", "self-discovery", "writing

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